Week Twenty-Seven: Once Upon a Mountain

One upon a mountain, a gallant young Naval Officer spent the majority of a week teaching a course in Bavaria. Despite the somewhat long days and long walks to and from the class location, it was a highly restorative week. Teaching something she enjoys to people genuinely interested to learn is such a rewarding experience. Here's hoping more of these trips are in her future. The world needs our hero(ine). International liaising and things, you know...

Day 1 (183): 9th of June
First day of the class and I'm seriously questioning my sanity in climbing the bloody mountain on Saturday. Between the twenty minute walk from the hotel and the lack of air conditioning in the classroom, my back was rather cross after the first hour of instruction. The only recourse was to go back to the hotel after the rest of the lectures, drug up and pass out. Gosh I'm a wimp.

But the flowers were so pretty...

Day 2 (184): 10th of June
There is something about Bavaria that makes me feel as though I've stumbled across a film set in progress. I keep looking for the camera crew that must certainly be just out of sight. It's the sort of place where one can hear actual cowbells on actual cows. Walking to the base in the morning was celebrated with a soundtrack like a metallic waterfall. One might think there was a stampede imminent, but the constant racket is just from grazing calmly on a hillside. Who knew. My breakfasts with bacon and Michael Jackson (on the radio-thanks, German rock station) are followed by strolls through landscape out of some famous painter's daydreams. I can suffer through this as long as I am needed. Even with the churchbells every fifteen minutes.

Honestly. Look at the scenery.

Really, just look. Like a set. You can really find parts of O-gau that exist completely in monochrome. Totally bizarre.

Day 3 (185): 11th of June
As one walks through the lanes of this quaint little haven for nature and dirndls, one may feel as though one is viewing candidates for high honours at the Chelsea Flower Show. The amount of effort put into the average garden is truly impressive. Maybe it is just for show and to keep the whole Bavaria picture going, but any rate, it is marvellous and distracting enough to cause fits of clumsiness. What is this odd thing? The whole bush together is amazing, but I've no idea what to call the clawy flowery thing.

Even the weedy bits draw the eye. These are the tiniest little daisy things I've ever seen. Each face is the size of a dime.

Day 4 (186): 12th of June
Damn, I have to leave too soon. Our heroine (yes, there's a heroine... do keep up) has so much left to do, but alas the call of duty rings ever true. So many more meals to conquer and beers to sample. So many more mountains to ... erm... well... observe from a safe distance or from a nice gondola. But in the meanwhilst, there is this little guy.

And this view. Really rubbish, eh?

It is hard to take good photos of people's gardens without looking dodgy. But Lupins!!

Day 5 (187): 13th of June
Last night's storm ought to have made the pollen in the air go away, but the flora around here seems to have taken the rain as a cue to produce more of the sneeze-inducing stuff. The other result was a simply gorgeous morning with low clouds rolling over the mountain and the colours even more vibrant than before. Best part about summer is that the sun is already high in the sky by 0600. In this case, that is also the time that the previously mentioned bells in the Catholic church a block away give the village a wake up call. Probably something the locals don't even notice any longer. Like the trains that crash through my grandparents' tiny town several times a day. Back in Naples, it is time for more fireworks. Must learn to take better fireworks photos.

But the full moon looks rather neat through the misty clouds.

Day 6 (188): 14th of June
Another Saturday back in Naples. But someone else is cooking dinner and all I have to do is arrive and be my oh so charming self and drink Pimms. Shame about the view though...

Not sure what to say about this. Just, well, Naples (OK, Pozzuoli).

Day 7 (189): 15th of June
Happy Father's Day! Apparently Italy did well in some soccer-related international event. It certainly explains the wallpapering of the Naples region with Italian flags and the fireworks in excess even by Neapolitan standards. Any rate, it is getting late and my internet is lame. Here is a lemon from my tree.

With that, the travels of our intrepid protagonist come to a close (for now). We'll see you again next time. 

Week Twenty-Six: Blithering to Bavaria

I turn to others (mostly dead others) this week to say what I am perfectly capable of saying. They just have better names and as such their way of saying things is better. The week started in dreams and ended in Bavaria.

Day 1 (176): 2nd of June
“What, then, is truth? A mobile army of metaphors, metonyms, and anthropomorphisms – in short, a sum of human relations, which have been enhanced, transposed, and embellished poetically and rhetorically, and which after long use seem firm, canonical, and obligatory to a people: truths are illusions about which one has forgotten that this is what they are; metaphors which are worn out and without sensuous power; coins which have lost their pictures and now matter only as metal, no longer as coins.” (Friedrich Nietzsche)
How about this illusion? Who knew there was a rather cheeky face in the washing machine?

Day 2 (177): 3rd of June
“It takes patience to appreciate domestic bliss; volatile spirits prefer unhappiness.” (George Santayana)
There is certainly a volatile spirit in the door handle, too. Creeeeepy....

“By object is meant some element in the complex whole that is defined in abstraction from the whole of which it is a distinction.” (John Dewey)
Is this an abstraction? At least there are no faces in the tumble dryer.

Day 3 (178): 4th of June 
“I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.” (Ron White)

That has nothing to do with this photo of the moon. Unless the party is under the waxing moon.

Nor has it anything to do with this one of some pins. It's the year of the horse, folks. Get with it.

Day 4 (179): 5th of June 

“If the path be beautiful, let us not ask where it leads.” (Anatole France)

Is the path of a Naval Officer beautiful? Sometimes, certainly. 

“A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.” (Eleanor Roosevelt)
Sing it, Ellie! Being as how it is my mum's birthday today, that is fitting. She's as strong as they come. Happy Birthday, Mama! I am who I am because of you.

Day 5 (180): 6th of June 

“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.” (Mitch Hedberg)
Gone to Bavaria. Yes, that is a bit of Germany, but don't tell the locals. They'll get their lederhosen in a bunch. Gosh it's nice here. So green and mountainy and summery and sleepy. And I'm in a quaint but quite nice B&B called Hotel Fux. Yes that is really the name. It means Fox. But yes, I know. People are so nice. And things are so simple and quiet and ordered. Bless the German mentality. This is the view from my balcony. Big cross on top of big turtle-headish mountain.

Day 6 (181): 7th of June 

“Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.” (Mark Twain)
Do you want to build a sn- hang on, sorry... Do you want to climb a mountain? Of course I do. Because I am ridiculous. That thing I photographed yesterday? The one with the rocky bit and the cross? Why not. I've a couple days to kill in Bavaria and nothing else to do. Besides it's free and the weather is nice. Ready for a slew of photos? So nice and zen in the woods.

Even when those woods are on a rather intense slant. Why did I decide this was a good idea?

Even this tree wants me to turn around. "Back that way, silly thing. That way is down. Haven't you sweated enough?" Yes, I was doing my celebrated impression of a whore in church. Sorry, I mean to say a woman of the night in a house of worship.

Around this point I got adopted by a family of germans going at about my pace. Though really I think they mostly were concerned I'd kill myself without supervision. In the words of every Star Wars character ever, "I have a bad feeling about this."

Last little respite before the final climb. Again the temptation to turn round and go back. Only 45 mins back down (by the way, it took me just over two hours to get up here...) but only 20 mins more to the top of the peak... why not.

Didn't make it to the toppest top. Largely because of the omigawd pain in the spinal area. Also because the last 70 feet or so of climb was pretty much vertical. And my celebrated impression of a Bavarian mountain goat was a bit, erm, nonexistent. And I was wearing these.

Not too bad for a girl in pain. Got back down in almost exactly 45 minutes, mostly driven by the prospect of a soft bed and pain killers. But I made it farther up than I expected. To the shoulder just there by the top. Gosh this picture makes it look much less intimidating...

Day 7 (182): 8th of June 
“Our intelligence cannot wall itself up alive, like a pupa in a chrysalis. It must at any cost keep on speaking terms with the universe that engendered it.” (William James)
There were grand plans in place in order to keep on speaking terms with the universe, but instead I opted to keep on speaking terms with my spine (which still has not forgiven me for yesterday). Probably a boring proposition and one that is robbing me of a valuable experience, but really I think I'll stick with not being in any more pain than the usual. Standing up and going for food is a grievous enough prospect... I mean, look at the sad face on the pastry... I don't want to make that face.

See? Honestly. How pathetic. (But also so tasty - probably why it's sad.)

More of Bavaria to come. Consider the end of this week as a teaser for next week, which will be rather the opposite (i.e. mostly Bavaria with a close out w/end back in dear old Napoli).
“You tell 'em I'm comin' and hell's comin' with me!” (Sheriff Earp)